The banging must stop

Dear Editor:

One of the by-products of living in an urban environment that has been written about in countless articles, books, essays, stage plays, teleplays, and depicted on film, is the noisy neighbor.

Living in close proximity to others makes us all comprehensively aware of the customs, living habits, and routines of others. Some people don’t care about their noisiness and would say, “If you don’t like the noise, move to the country or go live in a one-family house.” To them I say, that kind selfishness and lack of consideration will ultimately lead you to loneliness.

But most noisemakers probably are just unaware how noisy their behavior actually is.

For instance, people who walk in a manner where the majority of their body weight lands on their heels, what I refer to as a heavy-footed walker, can sound as though they actually weigh five times their actual body weight. When you are walking above others, try shifting that weight a little more forward, toward the ball of your foot.

Sometimes people decide to vacuum their floors at 11:45 in the evening. Note: This is not the most appropriate time to be doing your housework.

I love music, often I like it loud. Maybe you feel the same way; that being said, maybe your neighbor doesn’t. So take a look at the clock and see what time it is. If it’s after midnight, it’s probably a good idea to keep it down, or invest in a set of headphones. They even make wireless Bluetooth headphones now so you can move freely about the house. This one suggestion also applies to the home theater enthusiasts.

Then there are the furniture movers. In case you haven’t heard, for $1.99 your local hardware store sells little sticky felt pads that can be applied to the bottom of all chair legs, ottoman legs, benches, or any other furniture that you feel compelled to move at 5:30 in the morning.

To those of you who have small children, yes they are adorable and they’re sweet, and they are cute, it’s just that no one wants to hear their pitter pattering little footsteps clomping around on Sunday morning at 6 a.m. Take them to the park, buy more rugs, or just teach them that it’s more appropriate for them to run around the house between 9 a.m. and 7 p.m.

Let’s not forget about the sexual conquests of all of you Don Juans and Donna Juanitas out there. It does get old listening to you climb the proverbial mountain of love in the middle of the night. Your crescendos are really enjoyable only to you and hopefully your partner, not anyone else.

If you are the handy type and like to hammer, drill things, or use power tools, the daytime hours on weekdays are better than nights and weekends.

So please keep in mind, headphones, little felt pads, less screaming and more breathing, more rugs, taking the little ones out to play, and shifting that weight forward, are all small things that can go a long way to improving everyone’s quality of peace and quiet.

Thanks,
Anonymous

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