We’re back with our weekly recap of “Real Housewives of New Jersey,” which stars three Hoboken residents: Chris Manzo, Albie Manzo, and Greg Bennett. Plus a bunch of (thankfully) non-Hoboken residents who live in tony suburbs. (“Tony Suburbs” is not one of the cast members.)
In this Sunday’s episode, the cast members are on the last hairy leg of their Napa trip, and Joe Gorga encourages everyone to hop into the hot tubs, likely so he can bare his skin once again. This also gives us another retch-inducing chance to see his brother-in-law, Shirtless Joe Giudice (TM).
In the hot tub, holier-than-thou Kathy Wakile wants to clear the air with her cousin, table-flipper Teresa Giudice, about various issues Teresa has with her and with former friend and also-holier-than-thou RHONJ matron Caroline Manzo.
They have a loud conversation that everyone can hear. Once again, alcohol and secrets don’t mix.
What follows is a fight between Teresa and Caroline that takes up almost the entire rest of the episode. Kathy and Melissa Gorga, who are trying to mend fences with Teresa, stay out of it. Jackie Laurita pretends she’s asleep.
Teresa tries to say she didn’t give the tabloids negative information about the others, and that she didn’t sell stories to them. Meanwhile, at the next table, her husband, Shirtless Joe, says he’s sold lots of stories for money. He brags that Teresa was on the cover of the magazines as if that’s a great thing. He says that anyone would take the dough. Chris Laurita says no, actually, Jacqueline was offered $50,000 to talk about Teresa and she turned it down. Burn! Well, she can afford to, and the Giudices probably can’t. Not if they want to keep that zillion-bedroom house and pool table.
Chris Laurita calmly complains to Joe Giudice that Joe G told someone Chris was “shady.” Tsk. All the men agree to get over it, and they kiss it out.
Caroline makes it clear that she wants nothing to do with Teresa ever, no matter what Teresa says. Since no one is coming to Caroline’s aid in the battle, her daughter Lauren briefly pops in. The men also get involved but then choose to stay out of it.
Joe Giudice finally tells his wife it’s time to split. They are getting an earlier flight straight outa Napa. Brother-in-law Joe Gorga decides, in the interest of new family togetherness, to leave early too. Teresa is touched.
Caroline goes into a room and cries, lets it all out.
After that episode, Andy Cohen does a “Watch What Happens Live!” special with both of them – taped individually. Apparently they can’t be in a room together, and certainly not live. The reunion show oughta be good, no?
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