What amazes Christopher Pak to this day about his best friend Steven Strobert are the number of weddings Strobert was a part of.
“He must have been in 12 wedding parties in 2000 and 2001 alone, and for most of them he was the best man,” Pak said two weeks ago about Strobert, who perished in the World Trade Center attack on Sept. 11. Strobert was 33 years old and had been married just under two years.
“Steven was always going off to various parts of the country for weddings,” Pak added. “He had made friends in a lot of different parts of his life, and everyone wanted to be near him. He was just that kind of guy.”
Born and raised in Secaucus, Strobert was a graduate of Boston University with a degree in engineering, and had a special talent for making friends, and making each one feel special.
At a Secaucus High School reunion a few years ago, Pak said, Strobert made a point of talking to every former classmate.
“Steven is one of those guys that if you have him as your friend, you’re blessed,” Pak said. “He was always there for you. I know I have been enriched by his friendship, and I could always count on him when I needed him.”
Pak grew up with Strobert, and even though they attended different grammar schools in Secaucus, they saw a lot of each other. Pak went to Clarendon School, Strobert to Huber Street School, and eventually both boys went through middle school and high school together.
“We attended all the functions together, like Little League,” Pak said. “I got to know him very well.”
Saw both WTC attacks
Strobert, who was living in Ridgewood when he died, started at Cantor Fitzgerald in 1991 after graduating from college. He was in One World Trade Center building when it was attacked by terrorists in 1993. As the six-foot tall and extremely athletic bond broker fled the smoke-filled corridors, he noticed a pregnant woman struggling to make her way down. He put his arm around her, and stayed with the whole trip down the 100 floors to ground level.
He apparently didn’t see this as a historic act, because he didn’t say much about it to his wife Tara, who learned about the rescue from Strobert’s mother, Barbara.
Strobert worked for Cantor Fitzgerald on the 105th floor. When he arrived at work, he routinely called his wife to let her know he arrived safely. He did this on Sept. 11, too, about 20 minutes before the planes struck the building.
After the planes struck, friends and family began to worry, although most of them recalled 1993, when it took Strobert three or four hours to call home.
“We thought it was the same thing on Sept. 11,” Pak said.
Family members and friends kept calling Strobert’s cell phone, and it kept ringing. But no one answered.
Marriage made in heaven
Strobert met his wife Tara on St. Patrick’s Day of 1999 when he was in the Plank Road Inn. She just walked up to him and publicly announced that he would be her husband.
This prediction came true in October 2000. Pak served as best man at Strobert’s marriage. The newlyweds bought a house in Ridgewood. But he kept close contact with his parents, who still live in Secaucus, and saw most of his friends wherever in the state they lived. Friends say he was very much in love and nearly always brought home flowers to his wife after work.
At the time of Strobert’s death, his son, Frank, was 20 months old, and already very much like Strobert. Father and son were very close, and Strobert spent as much time as possible with the boy.
Strobert was deeply involved in sports, both as a participant and as a fan. He was a local star in the local Little and Babe Ruth baseball leagues as a boy, but he also played on basketball, football and tennis teams. He also played sports after high school, particularly in the local softball leagues. In college, he got a taste for golf and later went on to become a member of the Essex Fells Country Club, although played elsewhere as well.
He was an avid sports fan. He went to jet games no matter what the weather. He was known for his elaborate tailgate parties in the Giants Stadium parking lot for the kickoff classic of the college football season.
In a memorial to Strobert last November, his brother Andrew said he sees Strobert when he closes his eyes – as a small child when the two of them played together.
“Steven would throw his little body against me in whatever game we could dream up – couch football, hallway basketball, kung-fu fighting, etc.,” Andrew recalled. “Once, while Steven was riding on the cross-bar of my bicycle, he decided to swing his foot into the front wheel. As we were tossed headfirst into the air, I grabbed him and pulled him close to my chest to protect him. We flipped over, landing on our backs, Steven on my chest. For a split second we were quiet, until Steven let out a burst of laughter, as if he wanted to do it again.”
Keeping his memory alive
For friends and family of Steven Strobert – just one of nearly 3,000 victims of the attack on Sept. 11 – life goes on. But in a move to help keep the memory of a man they say made a huge different in their lives, people closest to Strobert have started a charity foundation.
Strobert’s name kept alive by establishing a good-deeds foundation.
This private foundation will serve as a public charity, focusing on financially assisting individuals or groups to foster education of kids as well as to honor Strobert’s memory.
Because Strobert’s mother is an educator, Pak said, his friends thought this would be an appropriate way to honor him.
Barbara, a former member of the Secaucus Board of Education, is currently an educator at Fordham University. The concept for the Steven Strobert Foundation came about during the first week in October.
“We had settled down after Sept. 11, and then we got to thinking,” Pak said. “We wanted to do something to keep Steven’s memory alive, but we also wanted it to do something to help other people.”
Ironically, a dinner get together to kick off the Steven Strobert Foundation Inc. last November, evolved out an event that Strobert planned as a social gathering.
Pak said Strobert was a generous man, not just with his friends, but with needy strangers as well.
While they pondered establishing a scholarship in Strobert’s name, Pak said people often lost state and federal aid as a result of receiving scholarships, so the foundation wanted to find alternative ways to help without jeopardizing a students aid.
While details of distribution are still being worked out, Pak said, these would likely include providing libraries with needed books, and funding special programs in the schools that could not be funded by the Board of Education. While the foundation might start out providing help locally, Pak, a banker, said the foundation would seek to have a state and national impact.
“The bigger it gets, the more Steven will be remembered,” Pak said, noting that the paperwork for not-for-profit status is currently being processed.
As for fundraising, the foundation is centering many of the events on the sports Strobert loved, such as a golf tournament, and softball.
On April 20 and 21, 20 softball teams will play a two-day competition on fields at Millridge Road in the north end of Secaucus and Laurel Hill County Park in the south end. The games will run from 9:30 a.m. to 10 p.m. Pepsi has donated soft drinks for the fundraiser. Thuman’s, hot dogs, and White Rose food products have donated other items. Local umpires are donated their services.
Teams from throughout the area – who submitted the $300 entry fee – will compete for a $1,000 cash prize.
To contribute or to find out more information about the Steven Strobert Foundation, call (201) 865-3676 or write to PO Box 2314, Secaucus, NJ 07096-2314.