Jersey City writer Patrina Gardner’s new book “Still Scarred, Totally Healed” was published this past July by iUniverse. This is the second edition for the book, which is part memoir, part self-help.
Gardner said that in 2005 she had an epiphany while sitting in class that motivated her to rewrite the book with her personal account. The first edition was published in 2005 did not include the author’s personal story. The second edition includes Gardner’s personal account of childhood abuse, and it details how the author was able to recover through forgiveness and faith.
Gardner is a graduate of St. Peter’s College and a former reporter for the Urban Times News, where she worked until she began her book in 2005.
The author will be at B. Dalton Booksellers in the Newport Centre Mall in Jersey City on Saturday, Oct. 6, from 4 p.m. to sign copies of her book.
Recently, the author spoke at length with the Current about the freeing process of forgiveness and the healing process.
Q & A
DS- Is the second edition different than the first?
PG – It is a whole lot different. In [the second edition] I share my whole childhood abuse experience.
DS – Was it difficult to write about your personal experience?
PG – It was more of a release, because it was something I had been carrying since childhood. I was able to forgive myself and forgive other people after relating the experience.
DS – Have you gotten any feedback?
PG – It is interesting. [A man] said that the book was very helpful. I find it interesting that men are asking me about this book.
DS – Do you believe there is a stigma with men who have suffered abuse?
PG – There absolutely is a stigma with men in society. This is one of those things that the church has to acknowledge and help those who have been wounded. The church is supposed to be one of the greatest healing centers on earth. Over the past couple of weeks, I have thought that this message needs to get out.
DS – Did you feel that you had limited options as a child?
PG – I felt that my options were limited because I was afraid to tell my parents, because I was afraid that I would get in trouble. Wasn’t that crazy? Fear will paralyze you.
DS – What prompted you to write the book?
PG – Two things. An editor could send me out on an assignment, but I wanted to write something with a lasting impact. One Sunday, I was in my kitchen and I heard this song “Healed” on the radio. The lyrics go: “I may have some scars but I’m healed…”
I played this music and it was a healing tool for me – his music, his words.
DS – Were you religious before writing the book?
PG – Yes. Growing up [I went to church with my parents] and one day I thought – something is not right. I felt so empty. You try all these things, but you feel empty. I felt I can read about God all day long in the Bible, but I needed to be rescued by the Lord. It was time for me to really be healed emotionally, spiritually.
DS – Have you found your purpose?
PG – Yes, yes! I am working in my purpose now. I believe I went through this and survived. If you allow God to help you, you can be healed. Once you go through the healing process, you find out your gifts and your talents. We can’t give birth to these things until we are healed and made whole. But oh, when we do – everything that we touch is going to turn to gold.
DS – Name a few of your goals.
PG – I have so many things that I want to do. [I want to work at] a woman’s shelter. Just because you are getting food and clothes doesn’t mean that you are getting healed. To let them know that someone on the outside cares about them. So they can rebuild their lives one day at a time.
DS – Are you working on another book?
PG – Yes. It addresses the issue of domestic violence. It is another issue that we tend to sweep under the rug. Meanwhile all across America you have women suffering in silence.
DS – Do you have a working title?
PG – Yes, “The Exodus.”
DS – What does the title mean to you?
PG – It means exit, divine deliverance, and promise. God brings us out of one situation to bring us into a better one.
DS – Any final thoughts? What do you want readers to take away from the book?
PG – The greatest lesson to be learned is: although we cannot change our past, God can bring something back to its original state. Forgiveness is not about the person who offended [you] it is about [forgiving yourself]. It is a process. When we forgive, we take our power back. It is a freeing process. It allows us to live again, to love again, to laugh. It allows us to be the person we were meant to be. It releases the baggage that accumulates in our hearts and our minds. These are unhealthy emotions that break down our immune system. We have to learn how to pray for people who have hurt us.
“Still Scarred, Totally Healed” is available at B. Dalton Booksellers, in Jersey City, the author’s website, Amazon.com, and others. The author will be at B. Dalton Booksellers in the Newport Centre Mall in Jersey City on Saturday, Oct. 6, from 4 p.m. to sign copies of her book. For more information, visit: www.totallyhealed.org.
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