A strange thing happened to me on the corner of 11th and Washington Street this afternoon. It was near the charred remains of the German Bar and Restaurant Helmers, which burnt down a year ago, that I had a revelation. As an aspiring writer living in Hoboken, my hopes were succored recently by the publication of the “Why Do Men Have Nipples” book, written by fellow Hobokenite Mark Leyner. I thought, “Hey, if he can do it…!”
Ruminating on these thoughts while strolling up Washington Street, suddenly the Leyner book appeared magically before my very eyes: poof, there it was, like out of thin air!
Actually, the book was being held by chick lit author Caren Lissner, while she chatted with someone on the corner of 11th and Washington. The title leapt out at me, like a mystical revelation, as Caren cradled the book (another coincidence?) close to her chest. Amazingly, she also happened to be standing right on second base – as in (wink, wink), “Did ya get to second base?” Yes, she stood directly atop the golden “2” that’s embedded in the sidewalk concrete on the southwest corner of this intersection-posing-as-an-infield that celebrates Hoboken as the birthplace of baseball.
Hope surged through me. This had to be a sign from the universe! How could it not be a sign? I mean, no sooner do I think about the nipple book when suddenly, boom: I’m staring at it like a deer in the headlights. The strangeness of the moment continued. Heading up Washington Street toward my apartment, I found a crisp five-dollar bill on the sidewalk in front of the Chinese food place Green Garden. This infused the nipple premonition a few blocks back with deeper significance, giving it a financial weight. I decided it means my first book deal will be lucrative, like money from heaven. As Bush would say, “I’m the decider” of my mystical meanings!
Bending down to pick up the five, I glanced behind me for a split-second: long enough to notice Caren ambling my way. Now If I had a dirty mind, and wanted to thicken the plot of this story’s nipple/nurture theme, I could’ve made a play for the smart and pretty young writer right then and there. And with five bucks in my pocket, I’d be able to spring for pizza after!
I have an older female friend who told me that back in the 1960s, such acts of “spontaneous nurture” were actually quite common. But this isn’t the ’60s. And besides, I felt shy so I rushed inside. – John Bredin
The author is an English Professor at Essex County College in Newark & Boricua College in Brooklyn. He is working on a book of creative non-fiction essays. Comments on this essay are welcome at: jfbredin@hotmail.com.