Are you looking for love in trendy Hudson County? Not sure if you should give online dating a whirl or take your chances in the bar scene? A few local “HurryDaters” shared their experiences recently, including one man who will appear on a TV dating show this week.
Hoboken
J. Mitchell Nini, originally from Princeton, NJ, was looking for a change. He divorced in 2004 and was looking to improve his single status. Nini had friends in Hoboken and was familiar with the social scene. He started his own company, Haywire, which is an ad agency and opened an office in Hoboken.
After moving here in December of 2004 and settling in January, he decided to give Match.com, an online dating service, a try. One of the women he noticed on the site was Sonja Horton, who he expressed an interest in dating. After talking to her on the phone, he asked her to go out. She said yes, provided he didn’t mind one little thing: Their dates would have to be filmed.
‘Hooking Up’
Initially, Nini thought it was some kind of documentary. It was only later that he was told it was ABC’s new reality dating show called Hooking Up. The show, which premiered on ABC at 9 p.m. on Thursday, July 14, follows the dating adventures of 11 women. Nini will be on the segments that air on Thursday, Aug 4 and 11. As creative director of his ad agency, Nini said “we [creative directors] have a reputation for being a little outlandish.” Nini said he wasn’t intimidated by the camera; instead, he was looking for ways to make it work.
“It was a strange experience being followed around by a camera,” said Nini. “Everyone is looking to see who you are. It gave me an understanding of what it is like for a celebrity.”
Viewers will see familiar Hoboken places like Lua, Home Slice, and Anthony David’s. Nini tells of a funny experience at Lua. He said he was in Lua a few nights after filming and some guy asked him if he was the one that was filmed. Nini told the guy no so he wouldn’t get stared at.
Expectations
Nini said that he doesn’t have any expectations or a perfect type of woman. “If I had some kind of preconceived notion, I would miss out,” said Nini. “I want to see someone for who they are. They should be beautiful on the inside as well as the outside.”
Nini said he would like to find someone to marry and have kids with. “I think the show does prove that there are good guys out there,” said Nini. “Even some [men] that are looking for a serious relationship.”
Hardest part
For Nini, the most difficult part wasn’t the filming. For him, it was the work involved when meeting a stranger. “When friends recommend you to someone, you automatically get a pass,” said Nini. “But you don’t have that with internet dating. Friends are the key to establishing the pass.”
By pass, Nini means that the person is already seen in a good light based on the recommendation. According to him, with internet dating you are starting from scratch with no common ground. For those who are wondering if Mitchell and Sonja will stay together, you’ll have to tune in this Thursday and next!
HurryDate
Amy, a New Jersey resident, decided to try a local eight-minute dating service because she didn’t like all the work involved in online dating, and because she liked the idea of meeting men in person. HurryDate does the work for you. They invite the men and women. They set up the venue and the women that run the events keep things running smoothly.
You can pay for a one-time shot, or sign up and get discount to varied events in the area. The premise is that you can have from seven to 10 “dates” in the course of an evening. The added benefit is that you can see your potential mates in person without the possibility of them lying on their profile. Sounds easy, right?
The guys
According to some men, who prefer to remain anonymous, at a recent event at Tonic in Hoboken, the hard part was narrowing down their choices. Most of the men were interested in dating more than one woman, but the question is: how many are acceptable? One man there said he wanted to date them all. Another was interested in two women at the event who were friends with each other. He decided that might have too many problems and decided not to go for either of them!
The women
Most of the women at the Tonic event came in pairs. This might give them someone to talk to before the night begins, but could cause problems later. Most of the women at the event said that they were interested in dating, yet were not necessarily looking for a serious relationship.
Amy had a few guys who contacted her for a private date. She spoke with one of them for several days in a row, and she thought that they really hit it off. They made arrangements a few nights later. On the night of the date, Amy got a phone call from the guy two hours before they were supposed to meet for dinner. He said he had something to do for his father and wanted to meet later. She suggested that they just reschedule, but he insisted on meeting that night later, at 9:30.
The date
He wasn’t at the bar when she arrived five minutes early. He was 15 minutes late and then proceeded to grill Amy about dates with other HurryDate guys. He also kept telling her how much he wants to settle down. She said she noticed he was in a bad mood and commented to him that they should have rescheduled if he it wasn’t a good night for him. She said the conversation didn’t go anywhere, and after an hour they decided to leave. She thanked him and decided that she wasn’t going out with him again.
One week later, Amy got a long, rude message on her voicemail from Mr. Late. According to Amy, the guy thought that they were dating still and was furious that she didn’t call. Apparently, Mr. Late didn’t get the hint. Aside from Mr. Late, Amy went on a few other dates with her other matches. There were no serious matches made but Amy said she is not upset. She plans on going to another HurryDate in September. “We had a great time,” she said, “and I guess we will leave it at that.”
For information on HurryDate please visit: www.hurrydate.com