It’s me again, Susanne. In the issue of July 27 you had the chance to read about the feelings I have for Hoboken. As my move away is coming closer and closer, I was thinking a lot about my start in the United States and how different things can be. Traveling to other countries and actually living in a foreign country are completely different situations. As a tourist, you don’t always realize how life in this part of the world really works; you don’t have to handle the everyday challenges. I am sure that those of you who already lived abroad will know what I mean.
I would like to take the opportunity and share with you some of my experiences. Most of them are hopefully going to make you smile. I will cherish them for as long as I live.
And as you know, you grow with every experience and you overcome difficulties and become more flexible.
Getting a cab
During our first two months in Manhattan, we had to move once. We packed our belongings and went down on the street. We did what all Americans do: hail a cab. But it wasn’t easy. Some cars stopped, but as soon as the driver saw our five suitcases, he started the engine and disappeared as fast as he could without saying a word. My husband and I stood in the street what seemed to be an eternity. It was cold and I started to give up. Eventually a small limo stopped and the chauffeur agreed to drive us. Until today I don’t know why all the others didn’t want us as passengers. Isn’t it their job to go from point A to point B after all? Were they afraid of our luggage?
When we finally moved to Hoboken, we called Bell Atlantic and asked for a phone number. It was not a problem to get one. We were asked to go to “Willow Pharmacy” to deposit the check. A pharmacy? What for? Nobody was sick. As we arrived at the place we understood: in the back of the store was (and probably still is) a counter where you can handle your telephone business.
My next route was to City Hall. When I first moved to Germany, I had to go to an office with all my papers (birth certificate, passport, lease) and register myself. Used to this custom, I went to City Hall in Hoboken. Nobody understood what I wanted. Everyone asked about my car. But I didn’t have a car, and why was there such a big interest about a car? At the end I figured it out: you only register your car; you don’t register yourself.
Have a nice day!
Regarding city buses, I had a lot of different experiences: when I first started to use buses in Hoboken, I didn’t know that you have to wave to make the bus stop. In Austria, the driver stops at each stop. It so happened that I stood on Washington Street at a bus stop waiting. Some buses would pass in front of me, but none of them stopped. It didn’t took me long to understand, but it was an experience. One day shortly after that, I waved at the driver, he very politely waved back at me and continued his way. So I had to wait for the next bus. This time I almost jumped in front of it to make sure he would stop. But this only happened once. For the next three years I had no problems with bus drivers.
Actually I really like the fact that you greet the driver, and before leaving the bus you wish him a nice day or a safe drive. First of all, it is polite, and secondly, we put our life into their hands. I started greeting bus drivers in Austria. Each time I did so, I got a strange look, as if asking “what does this crazy woman wants from me?” This is sad. Politeness and a smile are so important.
Now that I am going to live in France, I am already curious to see how French drivers will react to my greetings.
One of my favorite experiences involving buses took place in Manhattan. Passengers apparently like to change seats: window seat, single seat…So, one day I wanted to be part of this “game”. Unfortunately I wasn’t fast enough and at the end I had no seat at all.
Liberal return policy
A lot of things appeared to me to be easier here in the States. For example, return policy in shops: even without receipt I was able to return clothes. I didn’t know that you can even return shoes for 30 days (of course you are not supposed to wear them on the street). This is unthinkable in Austria. You are allowed to return some very specific items, but it must be within 10 days and you should have a good reason. And there are shops which don’t accept returns on a Saturday. Please, don’t ask why; I have no idea.
I also find the opening hours of restaurants in the States much more convenient than in Austria. Lunch in Austria is from 11:30 a.m. to 2:00 p.m. and dinner is normally between 6 p.m. and 10 p.m. These are the times were you should be hungry. You want something to eat at 4.30 p.m.? OK, you have the choice between cake in a coffee house or a supermarket. That’s it. Most of the restaurants are closed.
What I’ll miss most
These are just a few examples to show how different everyday routines can be. I didn’t mention the always present air-conditioning, the “wait to be seated” in restaurants, the ice water or the convenient opening hours of almost every shop.
What amazed me the most and what I will miss the most is the friendliness of the Americans. Whenever I traveled within the United States, people were helpful, polite and did what they could to make my stay a nice one. This is something I will never forget. And patriotism. I didn’t know this strong feeling of unity before. But believe me; I am more attached to Hoboken and America than I ever was to Europe, where I lived 32 years.
My advice to everyone who intends to move to another country or travels as a tourist is the following: other countries, other customs. Don’t try do understand everything. It takes a lot of time and energy and doesn’t change anything.
When we are foreigners somewhere, we have to accept and respect the rules of the country. Traveling is very interesting, educative and challenging. It opens our mind and shows us that there are different ways of handling situations and therefore we can compare. You will probably always find things that you like better in some countries and things you like in your own country. The world would be perfect if we could pick all the good things from all over and shake them together. As this is not possible, we have to do everything possible to make the world a good place for us and our children. Tolerance is very important and comes also through traveling.
In this sense, travel happy, safely and be open!