Hudson Reporter Archive

The last hurrah

In a move that shocked the newspaper community, JoAnne Steglitz, 29+, renounced her position as the Current editor earlier this week. "I just thought it was time to focus on my real passion – pot," Steglitz said in an across-the-cubicle interview.Pottery, or "pot" as Steglitz refers to it, has garnered the budding ceramics star increasing attention since she sold her first lopsided coffee mug in early March. "It’s been amazing," Steglitz said. "The public support has been overwhelming."

To date, Steglitz has sold nearly 30 mugs. Impressively, over a quarter of them were designed with handles. "It’s mostly my family buying them," she said, "but I’m starting to hit up some of my closest friends, too. So I think it’s catching on."

Discovering her true dream has been a long and winding road for Steglitz, who, for the past three years, has been the editor of The Current.

Before beginning her illustrious career as a journalist, Steglitz received a Master’s degree in Cinema Studies from New York University, where she was applauded for her thesis: "Communist Motifs in Cannonball Run."

But after her application for an art-house research grant was rejected, Steglitz said she was forced to consider getting something her parents dubbed a "real job." It was only after responding to a classified ad promising "competitive-free wages" that Steglitz found her way into the Hoboken office of The Hudson Reporter, a giant media conglomerate that is the parent company of The Current.

"I really didn’t think I got the job after the interview," said Steglitz, who was fully aware that The Hudson Reporter was the powerhouse behind such esteemed publications as PhoneMed, Phone Hoboken, and All About Horses.

Sure enough, the company found a 4-foot-by-3-foot workstation to put Steglitz in. Since then, writing and reporting have consumed her life. She is credited as the moving force behind the Current’s weekly attacks on box office hits. Her annual best-movie list has routinely picked up top awards at the Razberries, while her verbal venom is often seen in the industry as an accurate prediction of Hollywood’s next multi-million dollar blockbusters.

"In some circles, she is considered a cinematic god," said Joe Del Priore, a Hoboken resident. Priore then added something that he considered "really funny."

Unable to find satisfaction in the written word, however, Steglitz found her true love in wet clay.

Co-workers bid farewell

According to insiders, Steglitz’s sudden departure was an office bombshell. "I don’t know what I’m going to do without her," said Editor-in-Chief Caren Lissner. "Oh, wait! I’ll hire someone else."

That someone else has turned out to be Reporter staff writer Eugene Mulero. The newly appointed editor said that he would miss Steglitz a great deal. "It would be so cool if she could stay," Mulero said. "But, then again, that would interfere with my promotion."

Others chimed in, mourning the loss of a beloved co-worker.

"It’s kind of sad to watch her go," said Hoboken beat writer Tom Jennemann, who has claimed first-dibs on Steglitz’s desk, apartment, and, in case it was up for grabs, inheritance. Speaking to Steglitz before her departure, Jennemann, unable to find the right words to express his feelings, asked, "Does your computer have Instant Messenger?"

Watching a three-year veteran of the newsroom suddenly vanish conjured up early memories of Steglitz’s arrival amongst several employees. "When I first met Ms. Steglitz, I had a strange suspicion that she had never been the Prime Minister of Korea," said one account executive at the Reporter. "Now that she’s leaving, I can confidently say that I was 100 percent correct."

For some, Steglitz was a virtual muse, inspiring writers to take a chance. "She gave me the courage to write my first in a series of the therapeutic back page essays," said Carmen Rodriguez, a frequent contributor to The Current.

Others agreed. "Inspiring? You bet," said staff writer Prescott Tolk. "She gave me the courage to stand up to abnormally oversized aggressors who physically threaten me in barroom settings. I recently forgave her for that."

The Hudson Reporter staff said farewell to Steglitz in the traditional here-is-a-cake-let’s-waste-a-half-hour manner. Sharing a common feeling about Steglitz, over 90 percent of the employees penned the phrase "Good luck!" in her greeting card.

Touched by the overwhelming sentiment expressed throughout the office building, Steglitz said, "All right. I gotta go now." – Anonymous

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