It’s official – I’m old.
This past weekend my little sister Katie graduated from C.W. Baker High School’s Class of 2001 (Baldwinsville, NY). When I got out of high school, she was only 8. Now she’s starting college in the fall, and I’m starting Rogaine treatments next week. As I scratched my balding head in amazement that time could fly so quickly, I could only think of how proud I am that she had made it, and how glad I was to be there celebrating the occasion with her.
The girlfriend and I made the normally four-hour drive to B’ville, a suburb of Syracuse, in a little under five hours, thanks to torrential rain in the Poconos and a tractor-trailer fire on Rte. 80. Despite the holdups, we managed to make it on time for the graduation party Saturday afternoon, as well as to guzzle a significant portion of my $50 in gas and tolls.
Despite temperatures in the mid 50s and an omnipresent, bone-chilling drizzle (you just can’t beat Central New York weather), Katie had a great turnout of friends, neighbors, and family who were treated to barbecued turkey, various salads, my Mom’s kick-ass lasagne, and a Pizza Man (50 Oswego St., Baldwinsville, NY) pizza that I paid for ($17 for an entire sheet pizza – try finding that in Hoboken!!!).
I used to do deliveries for Jim Delia, the owner of Pizza Man, and when I was in junior high I used to fold pizza boxes for him. I also coached his 8 year-old boy’s lacrosse team – that kid is now in college and I didn’t even recognize him when I picked up the pie.
All the relatives and friends of the family were nice enough to point out how old I looked, how bald I was getting, and how fat I had gotten. I even got the “where do you see yourself in two years” probe from one of them, so it was a little dizzying doing the rounds (the girlfriend got her share of interrogation too, mostly people wondering “what the hell are you doing with this guy?). It was nice to meet Katie’s friends, though, including her “boyfriend.” Though I’m troubled by the fact that he’s a Mets fan, if Katie’s happy then I’m happy (I guess).
Graduation was on Sunday at the Onondaga County War Memorial, and it was surreal to be in the crowd seeing friends of mine who were back for their younger siblings’ graduations. It was also surreal to watch my little sister cross the podium (without tripping) and receive the same diploma I received nine years before. All the pomp, circumstance and oration made me reflect on those nine years and what I had done since then. It’s safe to say I didn’t plan on being where I am now.
As I walked across my podium, I was launching my career in the military, which certainly would look good on my resume as I worked towards becoming a clandestine CIA operative. But thanks to a broken back and a fondness for fun and fluids, I scuttled that career and now I’m tending bar and writing self-deprecating sarcasm for a local newspaper. It’s discouraging to see what can happen if you lose your will to follow through.
So that’s my advice to you, Katie, and to any recent entrant into the “game of life.” Work for what you want to do with your life. Don’t let distractions get the best of you, and don’t let others dissuade you from following your dreams.
I think Faber College’s Dean Wormer said it best when he uttered the immortal phrase, “Fat, drunk and stupid is no way to go through life.” All I can say to that is at least I’m not stupid.
I know Katie will do well in whatever she does, because she made it through high school without succumbing to the social pressures that surrounded her. It’s no easy task to make it out of high school these days, and I’m proud of her for doing so with such class and self-confidence. I look forward to revisiting this column in four years, when she’s out of college and doing whatever she wants to do. Maybe I can follow her example by getting off my ass and doing what I want to do.
It’s never too late to learn a lesson from high school.
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“Hal Wastes His Wages”
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Hoboken, New Jersey 07030
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